First, I am thrilled to know you now 327 but some of these stories make me wish your group hung out with our group (your wife and us) because the trouble that would have gone down would have been priceless! Second crunch if you ever run for president I am. Not voting for you now anyway! Cuz I know you got stories! But that is ok cuz I can't run either! Third, kcal never had md 20-20 but after that story I will not! Forth, crip and wee, we still haven't heard the story about call girl! And not my drunkest story but two people here have seen me at my worse. The saturday night after the arky game crip, mrs crip, and I decide we should go out drinking! Well the meet me at the bar down the street at my house. I worked there when I lived in br and know everybody still to this day. Well I order a single crown and diet tall. Well I do this because I drink fast and don't need to be drinking too much before they pick me up. They get there and I order them a round and close my tab! I owe like 50 dollars! What??? I only had four drinks and their two! Come to find out mine were all doubles and being he knew I was friends with the owner was over pouring those! We leave and I realize I AM WASTED!!! I remember bits and pieces after that...thank goodness they still talk to me so either I didn't embarress them too bad or they decided they had seen my worse so it could only get better from there!
Okay, I guess I will tell it. Nothing big. Crip, myself, C-dub, and Crip's brother went to the crawfish festival in Breaux Bridge. This was back in 2002. C-dub's mom had us work for a few hours that Saturday and rewarded us with tons of beer and food coupons. Beer and crawfish. Day was going quite nicely. That night we went to that big bar in Lafayette. Graham Central Station, or whatever it is called. Well, C-dub's padna had the hookup and got us free drinks all night. Crip and I sang a horrible rendition of "You've Lost that Loving Feeling" in the karaoke lounge. Which I think led to me calling C-dub's padna's friend Ross from Friends the entire night. Okay, so we are back at the hotel. True to form, Crip is puking in the bathroom because he can't back down from any challenge, no matter how ridiculous it is. And I get the bright idea to break out the phone book and find a number to prank call. Well, found some escort service, secretly hoping they would answer, but got an answering machine. Left a lengthy message, not remembering a word I said. It was something to do with how I love the hookers and thought there's was the best...yada, yada, yada. Everybody in the room who wasn't puking his brains out thought it was funny. There is much I am leaving out. I will let Crip fill in the rest.
Some of you might have picked this up, but, I lived in Ohio for 10 years, went to high school up there and the whole bit, so when I go home, I go big. Anyway, the first time I go up north for a few weeks while on summer break, I call all my chronies and I drive over to my buddy Andy's house (we all lived in one big neighborhood and pretty much ran the show, or thought we did) and pulled out some chairs and sat at the end of the driveway, reminiscing about old times and talking about all the crazy things we did while in school. Granted, about 50%-75% of the stories were greatly exaggerated for dramatic effect. So me and Andy, call some more people over to come hang out. While we were waiting for them to stop by, Andy pulls out a fifth of 110 Vodka, which is about as bottom self as you can get. Anyway, we start drinking this putrid stuff straight but, no matter how nasty it was, neither Andy nor me was going to back down. We had our schools to represent. By the time our friends get there, the alcohol is done and Andy and I are feeling pretty good. Lucky for us, the rest of the group shows and what do you know, there's a party just down the road and the beer is flowing. We play a few games of beer pong and I tell stories about all the "cool stuff" I've done and hit on every girl that walks my way. Things get really fuzzy right about now but the next thing I know we were awakened by my neighbor who was headed to work. He was very cool about it and greeted me with a big "Welcome home Kev!" Turns out, I decided it would be best to make the 2 mile walk back to my house. Andy, being the good friend he is decided to go with me. I guess a nice cool bed of dew soaked kentucky bluegrass felt like a better option than my bed, which was a mere 40 feet away. I spent a better part of the day, hung over to hell and searching for my car, which was back at Andy's house. Needless to say, I don't drink much vodka anymore.
Let me add a few details to Wees Story. 1.) We got to the fairgrounds BEFORE it opened and started drinking. 2.) Got to work the crawfish eating contest. If you want to call it work. 3.) Drank so much that my brother thought it would be a good idea to humble himself before the Crawfish Queen and bow repeatedly whenever she passed us walking. 4.) Was tempted by a Carney chick to play a game and win "HER PANTIES", to which my brother replied, "ONLY IF THEY GOT SOME STANK ON EM" 5.) The Guy REALLY LOOKED LIKE ROSS FROM FRIENDS! 6.) It is not good to SLAM 6 Red Bull and Vodaks within a minute, espeically when you hate red bull! 7.) The abortation that was me and wees singing was so BAD they TURNED THE MUSIC OFF! Why was it so bad....1. WE FORGOT THE WORDS to a song we have sung 100s of times. 2. WE WERE SO DRUNK WE COULD NOT READ THE WORDS! 8.) Red Bull and crawfish are HORRIBLE coming back up! And lastly Wee does love the Hookers in U Laa Laa land!
Oh which one do I pick. Okay here goes. Back in my younger days, me and a friend of mine decided it would be a good idea to split a bottle of jaeger and a 12 pack of beer. Yeah, brilliant right. I'm not sure where I lost track of time or conscieneness but anyway, I ended up face down in the parking lot UNDERNEATH my friends truck. The next thing I remember is I'm being given a ride home by these 3 rather nice looking young lasses but I no longer possess the ability to speak or move. This would not be so bad if I would have lost my hearing as well. They came up with what I still to this day consider to be the VERY BEST idea I have ever heard. Would have/could have been a hellova night but it just wasn't to be.
All these stories about ending up face down in a ditch, parking lot, etc. has got me thinking....you bunch of lightweights!:wave: Just kidding. I actually feel sort of left out that none of mine end up like that. Prolly cause I can handle my stuff!:grin:
in my early 20's i was living back at my parents for a few months in between living arrangements. they were out of town for a few days and had my grandmother staying at the house to keep an eye on me. for some reason i was not considered trustworthy. (go figure.) the problem was, my grandmother and i had a wonderful relationship, and she was the last one you wanted trying to keep me in line. so, i went out with some of the girls after work on friday evening for a few drinks. not sure how many a few turned into, but it was black russians and i felt absolutely no pain. managed to make it home, somehow, drunk as a skunk, and in a terrible thunderstorm. it was dark, late, i could barely stand, and i had to go make sure the gates to the horse barn were closed when i got home. the combination of factors made it to where i sliced my wrist open on the gate. only because i was feeling no pain, i had no idea till i walked in the house, trying my best not to look drunk to my grandmother and was trailing blood. not one of my best acting moments, tho she never called me on it. round two of the story.... i woke up the next morning, hung over as all get out, to what sounded like a running river. the door to the storm shelter was inside and next to my bedroom and when i went into the hall i could hear that the sound was from the storm shelter. the wall had cracked a bit and in the torential rains water was pouring in. for me the big problem was i had all of my belonging stored there. so with a hang over that was making me wish i was dead, i was lugging heavy water-logged boxes up the stairs to try to save all of my belongings. and then get the boxes unpacked and everything dried off. i've had better days.
This ones easy...spent all night long (till 5AM) drinking with my Dads best friend while working a Construction job in Houma (think it was the "Checkmate" lounge)...I was a mere lad of 17. That part was OK although I was completely chitfaced. We went back to our rooms and slept for exactly 1 and a half hours, got up and went to work. Think I puked all day, sure felt like it. It didn't even faze my boss, (he and my Dad had a good laugh about it all). It did manage to do one thing for me though, I've never been a big drinker since, so I guess I got the point. But, man...was that one miserable day.:shock:
Mid 70's, Biloxi with a bunch of folks from work. Sat. night, mass quantities to drink (sweet mixed drinks), prime rib and green peas for dinner (remember this, I sure do! :hihi. All walked about a mile down the street to a club, more drinking and dancing. Walk mile back to hotel about 1 AM, women taking off their long skirts to keep from tripping, cars honking at said women! Get in hotel room, get in bed. After 15 min., bed starts SPINNING!!!. I get nauseous, head for commode. Explosion of red and green (remember the prime rib and peas!), much yelling at toilet. Next morning, ordered breakfast, made me nauseous, had to go outside and get fresh air. Skipped lunch. Starter wife drove home. Ate something small for dinner. Never been drunk since, I swore off. Intelligent people should just not do such bad stuff to their bodies. All professional drinkers told me if I had to be at it a long time, drink good bourbon and water, scotch and water, or scotch and soda. And that's what I did. I like a margarita or two, or gin and tonic, but no more than two. Two a night is pretty much my limit on anything alcoholic these days.
Would have to have something to do with MD 2020 and paint and school buses (city not named), or tequila and a rodeo and a rope in Henrietta, TX, or tequila and a naked girl on a street in downtown Auburn, or grain alcohol and the night Rocky Horror first played in Auburn, or Long Island Tea at a yacht christening in Houston, or copious amounts of wine at a former GF's wedding in Sonoma. Then there are the ones I don't remember.........
