Time flies, trust me. They'll be out the house before you know it. I'm told grandkids are WAY more fun. I can't imagine this but looking forward to finding out one day. Yep. I told someone that last week. It still stings when that day comes though. I had that talk with my daughter a few years back after they'd dated a year or so. His family adored her (their words) and not just his mom, I'm talking about the grandparents on both sides, and cousins, etc. I told her it was all fine and dandy but the day would come when, very likely, consciously or not, his mom would "see her" as "taking" him away. Course dad was nuts cause they just loved her. lol Well, they still have a very good relationship but she came to see where it appeared dad knew what he was talking about. She never came back and told me I was right and I never pointed it out. The few times there have been some misunderstandings I've always tried to make her try to understand his mom's perspective and understand that the few misunderstandings (so far) have been from his mom having good intentions, just overreaching a bit. One on instance I really agreed with my daughter's reason for being upset but I didn't let on to that cause it would have only added fuel. I just made it clear that I understood why she could feel that way then tried to show a positive side of the "overreach". What I tried to drive home is that the BF would choose her but how it's hard for a man backed into that position to be at peace, internally. There are exceptions, I know. I told her try to just go with the flow as much as possible, for his sake. That's on her. It still hurts me to hear that any time I do. If worse comes to worse, round-house that bitch.
That's what she wants now, I should have done it in between years where he disappeared but she was way too young and I wanted her to get a little older so she had more of a say in the matter.
How do you guys feel about divorce. Better to stay and argue everyday to be with the kids or split chaulks and see them on weekends??
Used to feel sure staying was better but research now show not always true. To do it over I wish we knew more conflict resolution practices. Men/women need to realize we don't see the world the same and understand one another differently in addressing "issues." As you get older all the arguing does slack off, maybe too late but is it ever too late, really? So to answer you, work it out.
