An elementary school in Louisville, KY takes its 4th, 5th and 6th graders on a field trip to Churchill Downs so the kids can learn something about one of the state's most famous industries. Two female teachers supervised the trip. During the tour, bathroom breaks became necessary, so it was decided one teacher would bring the boys and the other, the girls. Not ordinarily being a place where children come, the track's men's room had no urinals for youngsters, so the teacher began lifting the boys one by one so they could use the adult facility. As she lifted one in particular, she accidentally noticed he was rather well endowed. "You must be in the sixth," she said. He replied,"Actually I'm in the eighth, riding Silver Arrow. Thanks for the lift."
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
“A guy walks into a bar and says to the barman, ‘You hear the latest bama joke?’ The barman says, ‘I should warn you, I’m from Alabama.’ So the guy says, ‘All right then, I’ll tell it slowly.’”
A man in his 40's decided to take his new Porsche convertible out for a spin. He had just begun to open her up when he saw flashing lights in his mirror. "I know I can outrun him," he thought, and punched it. The car quickly topped 100, but the man suddenly thought,"What am I doing?", and pulled over. The cop pulls up, walks up and says,"Tell you what...it's the end of my shift. Give me a good reason why you were going so fast, and I'll let you off." The man thinks fast and says,"My wife ran off with a cop last month. I thought you might be the one and you were bringing her back."