And you are not alone. I've seen this in many women, one in particular suffered burnout and depression because of it and needed counseling. In fact, it has been studied extensively and there is a name for it -- hurried woman syndrome. All the books say that the answer is simplifying your life. Easier said than done, eh?
Funny, I loved being a latchkey kid. It was just a few hours every weekday but it was my time to have some space for myself and be king of my own world, if only for a little while. Just goes to show that ones personal experiences don't always work that way for others.
Stumbled upon this thread today and some interesting topics. I agree that life is harder in most ways now whether you are single or married. I've been married 13 years and hope it's for 50 more. Some of the comments have made me realize that I should appreciate that even more than I do (just hard to reflect on things like that with so much going on in life). Hopefully that Jimi Hendrix song about being married has some truth to it (i.e. early to mid years have some challenges but the later years are the best).
I sometimes wonder how different life and my attitude towards life would be if I hadn't spent the last 35 years on a major university campus. I have friends my age that are already creaky old duffers who are essentially finished. I am soooo much hipper and more positive than those guys. Being around young people is healthy, I think.
No doubt we all experience things differently. I was coming home to an empty house at 6 years old. That was too young, especially for a girl. I was terrified every time the doorbell rang. As I got older it was more what you describe. Still, not what I wanted for my kids.
My sister & I were, as well. Honestly, I think we were probably too young to be home alone, and there's no way I'd even consider leaving my son at home, alone at that age. All that I ever did was watch TV and try to find any sweet food that I could get my hands on. We even spent summers alone at home. Looking back, it was really no way to go through our youths because we were bored. My sister read constantly, so it probably didn't affect her as much. But my mom (who was single) worked a lot, so we very frequently had no one around. And when she was around, she mostly slept because she was dog-tired. So my youth involved entirely too much boredom, and I never, ever want my kid to experience that.
6 is too young for sure. I went to a stay-at-home neighbors house who looked after me after school until 3rd grade when I had the confidence to take care of myself (and my parent's confidence, too). Wow, another very different experience than mine. I was never bored during the summer because I was mostly out playing all day with the other kids out of school. And I was really not bored when I was home alone. I was a voracious reader like your sister and sought solitude when I was reading. Of course, I was an only-child and onlies learn to entertain themselves early with no siblings to interact with. I do remember that my friends with siblings said it felt creepy when they were alone because they were almost never alone in their life. You learn something every day. I felt mature and empowered as a latch-key kid and had not really considered that others may have found it distressing.
My grandparents were married for over 65 years. I will never forget the first time my grandfather took a viagra. Literally chasing her around the front yard yelling "Rita Mae"! "Look at this"! "Come on let's hurry before it goes away"!
See, this is interesting. I think all moms fall into the "mom guilt/insecurity" category. For me, my husband is so paranoid about money (he was impoverished growing up and can't break out of that mindset) that he'd make me miserable about any purchases if I didn't work. As it is, he still tries to bitch about money.
