If you look in a mirror and say "Chuck Norris" three times, he will appear and kill your entire family... but at least you get to see Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris challenged a statue to a staring contest. Chuck remains undefeated. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there. Heart disease may be the new leading cause of death in women age 45 to 65, but Chuck Norris is still the leading cause of death in men age 0 to 125. There is nothing to fear but fear itself, and fear itself fears Chuck Norris. There's no such thing as a tornado. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks. Regardless of race, sex, gender, location, or education level... at one point in your life you have underestimated Chuck Norris. You will live just long enough to regret this. Uncle Sam doesn't want you anymore. He's got Chuck Norris. Eye contact with Chuck Norris, unless explicitly addressed by him, will result in getting your ass literally handed to you.
In honor of Festivus, more Chuck Norris feats of strength: There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. Chuck Norris does not solve equations. He stares at them until they break down. It was once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates to him. Those aren't credits that roll after Walker Texas Ranger; it is actually a list of people that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked in the face that day. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. If you unscramble the letters in "Chuck Norris" you get "Huck corn, sir." That is why every fall, Chuck travels to Nebraska and burns the entire state down.
Yawn. Maybe I'm too young or don't have a sense of humour, but I don't really find any of those chuck norris jokes hysterical. Some are funny, but it's not like it's original. Jokes in that format get old quickly because there isn't much you can do with it. Yo Mama, this, Yo Mama that. Chuck Norris this and that. Blonde chick. Two guys walk into a bar. Maybe I'm humorless. lol.
i was thinking maybe it was a guy thing cause i don't get it, or understand why guys have a fascination with chuck norris.
