Wow! Comparing lawyers to drug dealers! Don't you think thats being a little hard on the drug dealers? :dis: :dis: :shock: :shock: :dis: :dis:
You know, I dont have any love for lawyers either. However, it seems with as many people as post here, we would have a few lawyers in the bunch. Im kind of surprised no one has come to defend themselves. I thought about going to law school, but decided I didnt want to deal with that many stupid and evil (or both) people.
My teacher was telling us a story in class the other day. She's a linguist and told us seh was called in to testify in court over a will dispute. The will read something like "I leave all my money to Joe, Jill, Mike and Sam". Apparently Joe and Jill were suing becuase of the wording (and comma placement) that their father had meant his money to be divided up into three parts instead of four meaning -- Joe got a third, Jill got a third and Mike and Sam had to split a third.
Price I didn't feel sorry for Price. He got what he deserved. I was proud of Bama for letting that cheeseball go. I think he would still be the coach at FSU or Miami.
i dont know if the problem is lawyers as much as it is the judges who alllow these shenanigans in court
Two alligators were talking in the swamp one day and the small gator asked the big one "I don't understand it. We are the same age, we both grew up together in the same swamp but you're twice as big as me." The big gator asked him what he had been eating. "Same thing as you" replied the small alligator "Lawyers" The big one said "Where do you catch them?" "Same place as you do, at that big law firm at the edge of the swamp." The big alligator then asked the little gator how he caught them. "I crawl up under a BMW and when they open the door to get in I grab them and shake the shit out of them." "Well, theres your problem" said the big gator. "Everybody knows that if you shake the shit out of a lawyer all you have left is a mouth and a briefcase."
A very bright engineer who was well known for his many inventions and technological inovations died and so he reported to the Pearly Gates. St. Peter told him "I can't seem to find your file. You must be in the wrong place." So the engineer reported to Hell. Finding the conditions in Hell much to his dislike he started tinkering around and made all kinds of improvements. The next thing you know Hell had air conditioning, flush toilets, cold running water and even an ice maker. God called the Devil one day and said "How are things going down there, as if I didn't know?" Satan replied "Fantastic! That engineer you sent down here has given us air conditioning, cold water and even an ice maker." "An engineer in Hell" God said "Thats got to be some kind of a mistake. Send him back here right away." "No way" sneered Satan. "We all love the changes he has made around here." "If you don't send him back to Heaven I'll sue you." replied God The devil just laughed and told God "Yeah right. And just where do you think you are going to get a lawyer?"
