You got me. I hadn't heard that one. I'll have to tell you, considering the history with "smack" being directed at AU from decades ago about "cow college," it was one of the funniest I've seen in this thread.
I will say I didn't, but if you become a contributor you wouldn't have to wonder if I am lying.:thumb: It is painless and fair to the people who provide us this forum. I think I might have given red to one person since I came to this site, a Vol right after Katrina. I give green for things that I find insightful, funny, new, or just different. If something really deserves red, I am sure one of the mods would address it better than I could with a pixel.
Bama joke... Three football fans were out for a ride when one noticed a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and discovered a nude female, dead drunk. Out of respect and propriety, the fan from LSU took off his cap and placed it over her right breast. The Ole Miss fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast. Following their lead, but with some grumbling, the University of Alabama fan took off his cap and placed it over her girly part. The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his inspection. First, he lifted up the LSU cap, replaced it, and wrote down some notes. Next, he lifted the Ole Miss cap, replaced it, and wrote down some more notes. The officer then lifted the Bama cap, replaced it, then lifted it again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last time. The LSU fan was becoming annoyed and finally asked, "What are you, a pervert or something? Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and looking? "Well," said the officer, "I am simply surprised. Normally when I look under a Bama hat, I find an ass hole.
Re: Vasectomy for an Alabama fan An Auburn grad and a Alabama grad were out hunting one day when they came upon a nude woman stretched out on the grass. "What are you boys doing today?", she asked. "We're looking for game", they answered. "Well", she cooed, "I'm game". So they shot her.
A professor at Auburn University was giving a lecture of the supernatural. To get a feel for his audience, he asks, "How many people here believe in ghosts?" About 90 students raise their hands. "Well, that's a good start. Out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you have seen a ghost?" About 40 students raise their hands. "That's really good. I'm really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?" About 15 students raise their hand. "Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?" 3 students raise their hands. "That's fantastic. Now let me ask you one question further...Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?" Way in the back, Bubba raises his hand. The professor takes off his glasses, and says "Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture; no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your experience." The big redneck student replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium. When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks, "So, Bubba, tell us what it's like to have sex with a ghost?" Bubba replied, "Dang! From way back there I thought you said "Goats."
You got this one mixed up since all the bubbas (i.e., Bubba Gump) and rednecks are bama fans who have no clue where Tuscalooser is:rofl:
This was from an Ole Sis board, posted by LSU---Tiger. After having dug to a depth of 1000 meters last year, Scottish scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 1000 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 1000 years ago. Not to be outdone by the Scots, in the weeks that followed, British scientists dug to a depth of 2000 meters, and shortly after headlines in the UK newspapers read: "British archaeologists have found traces of 2000 year copper wire and have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network a thousand years earlier than the Scots." One week later, "The Advertiser", a Lafayette, Louisiana newspaper, reported the following: "After digging as deep as 5000 meters in cane fields near New Iberia, University of Louisiana at Lafayette scientists have found absolutely nothing. They have, therefore, concluded that 5000 years ago coonasses in South Louisiana already had cell phones."
