"I can't believe we got drafted by the METS!"

If I could just find my contact lens.....

Wait, so you're telling me that athetes foot spray doesn't make you run faster. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

Atleast this hair dye isn't permanent. D'oh.

Just....a little......closer....

Whose idea was it to serve roadkill enchiladas for breakfast.

I sure wish people would stop asking me to approve their electrical cords!!!

Its okay........you can do it.....No one is looking, I promise!!!!!

Is he the USL "designated hurler?"

You're telling me my transfer to LSU didn't go through and I have to play for this crappy team for another year?!?!?