"Went in for a prostate exam this morning. I asked the Doctor where to put my pants and he said "over there by mine"."
Man and his wife watching National Geographic on TV about an African tribe. The man says "look at that, they tie a weight to their penis and leave it there till it's stretched to 24 inches long. I think I'm going to try that " The wife just looks at him funny and says okay. A few weeks later the man calls out to his wife and says "honey, I'm half way there"!!! She says "Wow 12 inches huh"? He says "no, but it is completely black now"
So @Bayou Tiger calls me the other day and asked "what do you get when you mix human and goat DNA"? I said "you get thrown out of the petting zoo you sick bastard"
There is a new computer virus going around. It's called the Lorena Bobbitt virus. It turns your hard drive into a 3 1/2 inch floppy.
